Thinking Bigger Isn’t Enough (Here’s What Actually Changes Things)
Why “playing small” isn’t the problem at all
As long as I can remember, my coaches and mentors told me the same thing:
You need to think bigger.
You are playing small with your goals.
Toughen yourself up.
You are not doing enough.
From corporate to becoming a business owner, the message, or the requirements, didn’t change. No matter how big I thought and how big goals I wrote down and affirmed, nothing changed.
When I was a few years in in the corporate, I watched those powerhouse women who felt almost steel-proof. Tough. Sharp. Unbreakable.
I thought they were perfectly integrated into that world.
But then, in intimate settings they shared how difficult it was to juggle stress, balance, and family — never having time for themselves, never feeling enough — or their real selves.
They had built that mask and identity to survive.
When I worked in tech, in a male-dominated environment, the clicking heels were part of the armour.
But it never really worked.
It was always overworking. Burnout. Thought that would be the way to grow my career. And slowly, it pushed me further away from who I actually was.
When I moved to New York City, I was told I needed to toughen myself up — otherwise people would walk all over me.
They didn’t, because I already knew myself better, but I kept playing small because I didn’t know how to how to hold space for expansion — and not to open up and shut down like a sunflower.
Feast and famine cycles show this pattern clearly.
I recently saw a post from a woman coach saying that everything changed for her once she started thinking bigger.
Her business exploded rapidly in a very short time but after being in business for a decade.
What most people think is that she got finally got lucky, quantum leaped, or did one right thing — and it was success overnight.
But they don’t see is what happened behind the scenes.
Working with a mentor who was ahead of her.
Doing deep healing, mindset and trauma work.
Decluttering her old business and parts of her life.
Creating a new business model that worked for her lifestyle and her needs.
Surrounding herself with right kind or support, and people.
She claimed what she wanted — and decided to go for it.
This decision needs to be made first.
Then:
Re-structuring, building up systems, tools and behaviours, and inner capacity did.
Changing the environment to support growth.
Ability to hold success without self-sabotage.
For many of us who have experienced burnout, the idea of “going bigger” doesn’t feel exciting — it feels unsafe. But this deep subconscious pattern often orchestrates the show behind the scenes.
It shows up as:
pushing harder instead of changing what’s not working.
doing more, holding more, and carrying it all alone.
growth turning into pressure instead of progress.
working harder while feeling more overwhelmed and exhausted.
self-destructive habits
I’ve worked with hundreds of people in hypnosis and the unconscious mind holds very clear reasons and beliefs why it rather holds us back from receiving and expansion rather than supports us.
When this is changed people start feeling free.
So it’s not about thinking small. Or that we don’t want more hard enough.
Our nervous system remembers how painful it was to over-function, push, or fail, burnout and distance ourselves from who we are — and then believe we don’t have what it takes to fulfil our potential.
This is why women often hold back.
Until something changes underneath and our goals and desires are aligned with our values, trust, and systems that help use take action in a healthy way.
Thinking bigger is not enough.
If you think “playing small” blocks your way to growth, it’s not true.
Growth becomes possible when you (aka) your nervous system feels safe enough to receive it, and when there’s someone to support you and show you how to expand.
And that’s exactly what we’re exploring in the next Growth Club community masterclass.
✨ From Thinking Small to Steady Growth & Brave Action
Taking bigger, steadier action without burnout or self-sabotage
🗓 Wednesday, February 11
🕑 2 pm CET | 1 pm GMT | 8 am EST
📍 Live on Zoom
🤍 Cost: Free
This class is for you if you know you’re capable of more —
but you don’t how to get there, and you don’t want to force yourself, toughen yourself up, or burn yourself out to get there.
We’ll talk about how to stop playing small by staying regulated while you take action — so growth can finally feel accessible, exciting and motivating.
I’d love to have you there
Jenni
P.S. Growth Club is a free community including a monthly class or workshop. When you sign up, you will get the details of the next class. Join here